so here i am – back in texas once more. God is so good – he keeps speaking over me his loveloveLOVE. it’s a wonderful thing to hear in this season.
my heart feels broken into about five hundred little pieces – but it’s a good kind of breaking. the river flows to the lowest place… the river flows to the lowest place. i feel like i’m daily humbled – and being back in texas, of all the places on this earth, feels like a big humbling experience. i keep trying to leave this place, hahaha, and God keeps sending me back. maybe you’re trying to tell me something, eh Papa??
in any case.
i feel like Lord is teaching me how to choose him above everything else right now – and it’s a brutally painful, awesome, glorious, broken journey.
for like, the hundredth time in a row (or so it seems) my heart was just shattered to pieces over something else! ah! how you love bringing me to that place of desperation time and time again don’t you sweet Papa?
i’m so glad he does it.
i’m so glad he cares enough to bring me low.
i’m so hopeful for this time of my life.
i’m rediscovering the dreams of heaven!
and i’m letting go of the things i’ve built my heart around.
i want purity of heart! i want to desire one thing!
Jesus. only him. he’s enough.
so what do these next days hold? i’m not sure entirely. going to jump on board at the house of prayer in dallas – full time intercessory missionary! those words are a long time coming. i’ve put off so many things the Spirit’s been speaking for so long out of fear and out of trying to live up to these expectations that the world loves to create. no more. i want Jesus. call me crazy, i probably am. i don’t know the logistics of how everything’s going to work out… all i know is that no longer will i live by what the world, the “church” and people at large think is appropriate. i want to be moved by the Spirit of God. i want to have faith to see Jesus’ eyes, to look him in the face and call him beautiful. i need his grace to sustain me.
a lot of people want to call me a radical.
friends, i’m not radical… i’m desperate.
i’ve seen me in my weakness, and i’ve tasted the beauty of his strength and grace… and i know he’s life.
he’s life.
he’s truth.
he’s love.
he’s enough – more than enough.
no i’m not radical, i’m just desperate… i’m just broken and needy.
thank you Beloved.
every day with you is new.
Where did you get this picture?